i'm not gonna lie, being 30 sucks big time. i have had quite a week. don't really feel like sharing, but things seem to be looking up... finally!
as for my menopause - i will know tomorrow if my insurance is going to cover my treatment expenses or not. if not, i can apply for a grant to get my monthly shot at a discounted price which would be $125 a month as apposed to the $600 a month they would charge my insurance. so, hoping that my insurance will cover it and if not hoping i can come up with $125 a month for the next 5-11 months. paying for menopause, whoever would have thought!
and as i have stated before, i am having a very hard time realizing that i have to do this (menopause) all over again in 20 years or so. i'm guessing it's really not fun to be menopausal at any age but being 30 and going through this is very difficult - although i am going to do anything i can to get rid of this pain that i am attributing to endometriosis. it's hard not to know if it's the sun that's making me super warm or a hot flash or if i am crying because i am upset for a good reason, or if i am just crying because i have been pumped full of hormones. i guess it's safe to say i don't even know who i am these days - i can only imagine that the ones around me are having a hard time figuring me out lately.
i am hopeful that i will be happy, normal and pain free in just a few months, although the menopause symptoms will last up to 10 weeks after my last shot. i am ready to get feeling better and find a decent paying job that i will like and i can move on and up from there. it will happen, i have to believe that i can have everything i dream of because i deserve it and i will work hard to make this all happen.
i guess that's really all i have to say today and will report back tomorrow on the status of my Lupron shot. please wish me luck!
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